Dear Hiring Manager:
Peculiar as it is, this is a cover letter.
Since your time is a valuable resource, stop reading if you expect the next lines to be something utterly conventional that will answer all your questions and inspire you to feed the poor.
This will not be a squeaky clean, picture perfect, all skills checked cover letter. This is an unshapely, breathing, pulsating, living contraption that will either amaze or vex you.
I am sure that at this point you are immune to yet another copywriter, but as always there is one stubborn, egotistical daredevil who still believes in himself.
When it comes to words, I like to twist, twirl and twine them until they are almost alive, until they have a conscience of their own. And where are words, ideas will follow. I would not say that I will concoct the road to Mars. Then again, I actually may. Only that it will be in the form of a sixty second spot or a fifteen words blurb.
Maybe you are somehow miffed by what you have read so far, but if you reached this line, my words definitely did their job. You are right to consider me a smarty pants at this point, but this pair of glittering pants definitely caught your eye.
So why would you even consider a foreigner with a strange name that came out of nowhere? I could give hundreds of reasons, dozens of examples, and quite a few clever puns that will include Superman in them, but I will not. I’m more of a Batman type of superhero.
Regards,
Amo. Lucian